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March madness

What’s Spoon Theory?

“The Spoon Theory”, a personal story by Christine Miserandino, is popular among many people dealing with chronic illness. It describes perfectly this idea of limited energy, using “spoons” as a unit of energy.

I learned about the Spoon Theory while participating in LiveStrong after my MBC 

The life events of March 2021 have taught me the following:

When I am stubbornly determined, I feel like I am gathering spoons from obscure hidden closets within my body. Using these reserves, I am able to accomplish more than I initially thought I could handle.

Once the spoons are gone, my body and mind are spent ... bone dry. I lose the ability to focus. My body heavily sinks into whatever position that requires minimal effort to support it and I become an exposed turtle outside its protective shell.

Uncomfortable at my exposure I may lash at others seeking to advise or console me.

I may reflexively respond to irritations with adrenaline, very short-term.

I have to rest... I am forced to rest for whatever time is needed...maybe a day or two perhaps.  It takes a longer time to fully function again, and some mental gymnastics to rise from the near road kill I have become.

But it comes.

I rise up again, climb back into my secure covering and slowly move forward gathering spoons.

This month has presented many opportunities to deplete my spoons, almost back to back experiences without opportunity to rest and collect myself.

I wondered what more I could endure when it is only mid-month. A phrase in one of my favorite hymns is "finding strength beyond my own" (Lord, I Would Follow Thee by Susan Evans McCloud b.1945 (c) 1985 IRI ).

I have been blessed this month with divine support to find strength beyond my own, so that I can complete my commitments to serving God and others.

I am so greatful for this sustaining power beyond what any collection of spoons afforded me.


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